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TEN ESSENTIAL ONLINE
DATING SAFETY TIPS
Online dating is the
best possible way to meet fantastic people who share your interests
and passions. Every year, tens of thousands of people get married as
a result of meeting on an online dating service. Millions of people
are doing it and, in general, online dating is regarded as a safe
medium for meeting potential dates.
Your online dating safety begins with educating yourself on how to
improve your experience and be safe doing it. Below you will find 10
tips to being safe during your online dating experience.
Ten Essential Online
Dating Safety Tips
Trust Your Gut
Instinct when dating online:
Your instinct is a powerful medium for knowing when something
doesn't feel right. It is also a great way to measure when to move
forward with someone and when to turn and run. As you read profiles,
responses to emails, have phone conversations, and meet in person
your instincts help tell you if something is "right" or if something
is out of alignment. The "out of alignment" message is your cue to
be careful, back off, or proceed with extreme caution. Trust your
gut instinct, it's the most powerful psychological tool you have at
your disposal.
Don't Provide
Personal Information Too Soon:
Your home phone number and full name provide easy ways to track who
you are and where you live. Armed with just your home phone number,
a person can easily gain access to your income information, home
address, and even learn the value of your home. Armed with your
first and last name, a person can do searches to determine quite a
bit of information on you - where you work, what you do, and even
what your home phone number is. So in the initial stages of
communication, guard your personal information when dating online.
As far as phone communication, see the next tip.
Use a Free Email Account:
If you decide to move your communication from the anonymous email
feature provided by the majority of online dating services then
provide an email address that isn't your regular one. Sign up for a
free Yahoo!, Hotmail, or Gmail account that you use just for online
dating. Don't put your full name in the From field - only your first
name or something else. This protects you from a person being able
to search your normal email address to find out more information
about you.
Use a
Cell Phone or Anonymous Phone Service to Chat:
When it's time to move your communication to the next level (talking
on the phone), never give out your home phone number. Either provide
a cell phone number, use Skype to communicate, or use an anonymous
phone service. It's just an added protection barrier until you get
to know the person better.
Beware of Married People:
It's unfortunate, but a lot of married people do use online dating
services. They'll even go as far as to meet people. A few years ago,
MSNBC reported that a study found that up to 30% of people using
online dating services are married! To help you in determining
whether a person is married or not, read the Online Dating Magazine
article, "Staying Clear of Married Men".
Look for Questionable Characteristics in Your Communication:
As you chat via email and on the phone you may be able to start to
pick out characteristics of the other person. Are they controlling?
Do they seem to anger easily? Do they avoid some of your questions?
These can be questionable characteristics that tell you it's time to
move on.
Ask for a Recent Photo:
There's nothing wrong in asking someone if their photos are recent.
If they don't have a photo, request a recent one. It's important for
you to get a good look at the person you may eventually meet. Plus
your instincts from your communications and their photos may provide
you with valuable insight into the person. Plus, if they tell you
the photo is recent and you meet and see a major difference, then
you'll know the person lied and can cut the date short. If a person
lies about their photo or profile then that is a red flag to no
longer pursue the relationship.
Stick With Paid
Online Dating Services:
Free online dating services provide a greater opportunity for
potentially dangerous individuals. They don't ever have to provide a
credit card or other information that identifies them. There is some
truth to the saying, "you get what you pay for".
Don't Get a False
Sense of Security:
Some online dating services claim to offer "background checks" and
when signing up for such a service you may find it easier to let
your guard down. Don't. Laws differ from state-to-state when it
comes to background checks and there are even several states where
checks can't be effectively performed. Because of the inconsistency,
criminals/wrong doers can and do get into services that do
"background checks". Never let your guard down.
Meet in a
Public Place for Your First Meeting:
When it's time to schedule that first exciting face-to-face meeting,
arrange to meet in a public place and provide your own
transportation. Your initial meeting will tell you a lot about the
other person, including whether or not he/she lied in their profile.
Your gut instincts will kick in. Never accept an offer to be picked
up at your house. Make sure that a friend knows where you are at and
who you are with.
By following these tips, you'll help protect yourself from being an
easy prey to someone who may have ulterior motives. With an average
of 100+ marriages a day from online dating, you can see that the
experience can be both safe and rewarding. Keep it safe!
Determine what type of
service is best for you.
There are five different types of online dating services that you
have to select from. Make sure you select the ones that match up
with your goals.
The first are General Online Dating Services. These are services
that provide you with the ability to view everyone who has posted a
profile and are generally aimed at dating. Such services include:
Match.com, LavaLife, and FriendFinder.
The second are Relationship Services. These are services that match
you with others based on compatibility testing and are generally for
those more serious about a relationship or marriage. Such services
include eHarmony and Chemistry.com.
The third are Social Network Services. These are free sites that
allow you to build your base of friends and potentially find someone
to date in the process. Such services include MySpace, Friendster
and Orkut.
The fourth are Niche Dating Services. These are services aimed at
bringing together people, to date, who share a specific common
passion or desire. Such services include Green Friends
(vegetarians), Equestrian Cupid (horse lovers), Millionaire Match
(rich singles), Age Match (Intergenerational Dating), and Senior
Match (older singles).
The fifth are Merging Online Dating Services. These services combine
online dating with offline applications. For example, Peek a Bio and
Chick n Chit allow you to post a profile then hand out specially
printed cards to people you meet in everyday life who you are
interested in. Using the card, these people can access your hidden
profile to learn more about you.
Decide which service(s) best meet your need, then pursue it!
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